My head hurts
The last couple of weeks have not been too good for me. I struggle to get motivated on anything, recently I started work on the Necron models I have, and whilst I got two models completed I’m not happy with them. To be honest they’re shoddy even by my standards, I know that I could have done much better.
I’m pretty sure that my state of mind is taking it’s toll on herself, she has so much to deal with and she shouldn’t have to put up with my woes as well.
I see a councillor once a fortnight and he is working on some exercises with me to help bring my frame of mind up to a better level and get the medication tweaked so that it has a better effect on me. I don’t know if I am simply allowing to be glum because I have been diagnosed bipolar, or if it actually is because I’m low, does that make sense?
I know that I should be making more effort to help myself but I can’t seem to find the willpower to do anything, certainly the last thing I want to hear from people is “cheer up”, if it were that simple, I’m sure I would do. I’m fairly confident that the meds will bring me out of this fetid pit of self loathing at some point and I will just have to ride the storm until then.
hopefully my next entry will be more positive.